ZoSoLover202

I don't understand anything. It's hard to figure out what I should do when I can't understand myself. I've been through some hard times even in this new year, but i have to say, for the first time, I think it might all just turn out okay. I think when it comes to the overall events in our life, you can only hope for okay. But some are great. Some are beautiful, some are pretty much the only thing that matters. Some are just what I've been needing. And that is more than okay.

Crushes finally posted one of mine: http://letterstocrushes.com/post/311786820/trendy-girl-you-like-bands-that-are-good-when I shouldn't have been so excited when I saw that. I'm such a girl.

In a month, it will have been two years since I've had peace of mind. Worried about what will come, what could be, and what has gone. Sometimes I am sure that I will fail, others I KNOW that I will.  I am lucky in so many ways, I count my blessings in relation to impoverished nations, and know that I could never be as strong as a man who grew up eating dirt patties and reading American pamphlets dropped from the sky about safe sex. When I think of how grateful I am, I become depressed about my fucking nerve to be depressed, and then I get depressed about the fact that I am depressed over being depressed. Pretty soon these thoughts will fa